Honne and tatemae are Japanese words that describe recognized social phenomena.
Honne (本音) refers to a person's true feelings and desires. These may be contrary to what is expected by society or what is required according to one's position and circumstances, and they are often kept hidden, except with one's closest friends.
Tatemae (建前), literally "façade," is the behavior and opinions one displays in public. Tatemae is what is expected by society and required according to one's position and circumstances, and these may or may not match one's honne.
There are I think two rather different aspects of this.
ReplyDeleteIn Western cultures we value the unifying of these things - living so "one's insides match one's outsides" or being "true to oneself." Some of us work hard to live that way, for some it comes easy and some never give it a thought. Some of the most interesting post-WWII movies from Japan have dealt with the theme of the personal cost created by a life lived based on the primacy of Tatemae.
However there is also the transitory and very superficial form of "facade" we adopt based on common courtesy or situational appropriateness. I may be a leftist atheist person who routinely cusses a blue streak at home, but when I'm on the job as a RN, patients never see that side of me. Over the past couple of decades I've seen a lot of Americans acting out in public in the belief that it is fitting to do so to be "honest" or true to themselves.
Now if a situation arises in my professional life that calls for an ethical judgement, I ponder it and make one that's congruent with my true self, even if it means taking on a doctor or hospital administrator. THAT to me is what is meant by integrating the two - not, as some Americans seem to think, disregarding common courtesy.
Your thoughts?
Hi Janet,
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing your thoughts on the subject.
My first thought upon seeing a reference to “false tatemae” and looking it up was: “well, that's interesting and useful distinction.” I think in Western traditions one can find a similar sense of division between one’s public personae and their private life, and a similar recognition that there can be a fundamental tension between what one wants to do and what society expects of them, but it was interesting to see the distinction drawn in such a neat and organized way.
And I agree those who would point to the tremendous personal cost to be paid for living a life ruled solely by society’s expectations. Of course there is another type of price to be paid to for disregarding society’s expectations and living only according to one’s true values and desires. So I agree that there is an art to integrating one’s honne and tatemae, but I wonder if it is possible or even desirable to have them fully integrated at all times and in all places.
And I can relate to value of maintaining a certain “façade” in professional situations out of common courtesy, situational appropriateness, or in the interest of advancing whatever organizational objective is at stake, as I think any kind of coordinated action would be impossible if everyone said or did whatever they wanted when they wanted.
The question then becomes one of when it is appropriate to “go along to get along” and when it is appropriate or necessary to stand up and challenge authority in the interest of maintaining fidelity to one’s true values. Does one withhold paying taxes to express opposition to the way tax monies are spent? There is a certainly a measure of moral integrity here, but at what cost?
But I do think that, as you indicate, there is value in and an art to positioning one’s self in society in such a way that one’s honne and tatemae are not constantly in tension. Again, I think a certain amount of tension here is inevitable (as in the tax example), but as in the example you reference, one can work to live in a way that is consistent with their true values – and how they negotiation those instances of conflict goes a long way in determining the quality of the life they live.
BTW, I came across the term in this thread:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.aikidojournal.com/?id=567